Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize