he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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