I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
