For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
