They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
