there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I fill condoms, not promises.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
May the power of my ass compel you!!
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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