I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
