we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I intend to get homeless drunk
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
