Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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