i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
my liver is dry heaving
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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