You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
he was CRYING into my vagina
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize