Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
