Can Purell be used as lube?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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