Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Acid is not a monday night drug
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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