i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize
