Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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