dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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