Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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