you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
