is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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