Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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