Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
