i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
