i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
