3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
