Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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