You really coming over, don't trick.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
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