I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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