how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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