I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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