Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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