Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
