No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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