So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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