i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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