and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
