Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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