Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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