You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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