the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
