would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
