the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
