Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
