I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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