I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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