erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
