I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
we're chasing vodka with high fives
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
