meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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