ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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