Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize